My very “good” male friend told me the other day about a conversation he had at work. He was catching me up on a contract job he had taken that was all sorts of fascinating. He’s working at a venue in a role where there’s a lot of time to stand around and shoot the breeze.
All the people, on this particular day, were men. He told me some hilarious stories from this wildly disparate group, who had been sharing the kind of tales that we pull out when we begin working somewhere new – the stories that have hit a mark before that we know will get a good laugh. This is how we become mates at work – sharing the other parts of us.
Are men willing to call out misogynistic comments that are made when women aren’t around? It was during that week recently when we yet again took to Melbourne streets to say we were sick of the continuing crisis of violence against women that one of his workmates shared a particular story. “My ex and I split up, and so I told her that if she came for the money or the house, I’d bury her in the backyard.” He laughed and added, “So yeah, she didn’t f---ing try, did she?” My friend stood there, not sure what to say.
He was horrified in retelling the story to me because he hadn’t known what to say; he had been taken by surprise. I sympathised – what would I have said to him? He wasn’t the only one; other men stood there looking down at their shoes, hoping the conversation would move on quickly. In all honesty, I imagined myself i.
