How are you bearing up under the strain of the wall-to-wall football coverage? My favourite pundit so far is Roy Keane for ITV1, who comes across like a resting Tasmanian devil (cartoon version). While perfectly calm and well-behaved for the most part, you fear that any minute he could kick off and it will be carnage. I cannot wait.
Meanwhile, on the BBC (best backdrop by far), Gary Lineker was doing his best to be this generation’s Jimmy Hill. After watching an interview with the Scotland manager after the Germany gubbing, the programme cut back to the studio where Lineker deadpanned: “Well, you got enough of Steve Clarke's energy and enthusiasm there, haven't you?” Stick to the day job flogging Next T-shirts and crisps, Gaz. Whenever I see Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen I think what a shame it is that Carry On films are no longer being made.
The man who jigsawed a television career out of MDF and saucy remarks would have made a perfect addition to the naff but nice crew of Kenneth Williams, Barbara Windsor and the like. LLB’s latest gig is Outrageous Homes (Channel 4, Thursday) , in which he meets homeowners who have gone above and beyond in interior design. Some have started from scratch, such as Billy from Cheshire who built himself a wild west ranch for £500, while others have taken on someone else’s fantasy.
Dawn and Derek bought the former home of Felix Dennis. The publishing magnate and party animal spent £5 million building a huge barn and stuffing it with all t.
