The six kinds of cosmetic surgery you can get botched in Turkey 19th June 2024 HAVE all your friends returned from Turkey with chronic conditions after botched operations, and you’re jealous? Pop over for one of these procedures: Hair transplant, £1,599 Concerned about your thinning hair? Worried that women, especially those of the 21-35 category who can afford to be picky, will reject you? How much more confident will you feel when your scalp’s polka-dotted with scars and boasting multiple cysts? Also your hairline’s uneven because the surgeon’s dog jogged his arm when he was drawing it. Brazilian butt-lift, £2,399 Life without that big ass that became fashionable in the last 15 years is barely life at all. Dreaming of being able to knock over vases with your bulbous butt, you book in for the flight, joking you’ll need two seats for the journey home.
In fact you can’t sit down because it’s horribly septic. Six weeks in an good old-fashioned British hospital having pus drained and it’s back to flat. Tummy tuck, £2,499 Overweight, but the GP won’t give you Ozempic because you haven’t yet got Type 2 diabetes despite a lifetime of trying? The only way to get a more flattering silhouette without lifting a finger is to turn to Turkey, the surgery paradise, even though you voted Brexit in fear Turkey might join the EU.
This decision goes as well as that one did. Labiaplasty, £1,999 If you believe your labia are in a state only a scalpel can fix nobody’s go.