When Thomas Jefferson wrote in the Declaration of Independence that our unalienable rights include life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, he had a very specific definition of happiness in mind. He believed that happiness was the result of living virtuously — that becoming a fully happy human required devoting yourself to service to your fellow beings. His words galvanized generations of Americans to seek out their own personal well-being.
Yet the happiness we pursue today is a far cry from that which Jefferson envisioned. It’s putting us in conflict with ourselves, and with others. Modern Americans have been conditioned to believe that happiness is something that we get for ourselves, by ourselves, through achieving material wealth, personal success and individual gratification.
I call this belief Old Happy. It is powered by systems of individualism, capitalism and domination that have fueled our culture for generations. Growing up in this individualistic culture, we are taught to see ourselves as separate from other people .
We’re taught that happiness comes from focusing more and more on ourselves and that we can perfect and grow this happiness through personal achievement. This does not work. In one 2015 study , researchers tried to understand why Americans who aggressively pursued happiness were, in fact, more likely to be lonely and depressed.
It was because they believed that focusing on themselves was the secret to finding happiness. This belief is further a.