OVER on TikTok, things are looking grim for young women. Some have taken to posting videos of themselves sobbing about the state of dating apps as they complain about terrible romantic experiences. But for me, at the grand old age of 43, things are looking surprisingly optimistic.
I’ve discovered a secret — that the problem with dating wasn’t me, or evil dating apps, but that your twenties and thirties are the hardest time to find love. Take it from me, dating in your forties is the best time to do it. I hadn’t planned to be still single.
In my thirties I fell in love with a man, who I had my most serious relationship with. We got engaged, planned to marry and tried to start a family. That all fell apart during Covid .
And as I found myself facing 40 alone, I saw a premonition of myself at 65 with 70 cats — and began to panic. But slinking back to dating in my forties, I’ve been surprised by how much I’m enjoying it. I’ve found it freeing.
The pressure I felt to meet The One — which made dating in my thirties fraught with panic as friends’ wedding invitations piled up and I wondered if a man would ever commit — has evaporated. Now, I’m not on the lookout for a husband and know I don’t want children, so I am not trying to find someone to have my babies with. That pressure to find “ husband material” or a “good dad” has disappeared.
Instead, I’m having fun dating bikers and flaky artists. I’ve also noticed a lot of my peer group are breakin.