BEL MOONEY: Can I keep on living a thrilling and dangerous double life? By Bel Mooney for the Daily Mail Published: 11:44 BST, 22 June 2024 | Updated: 11:57 BST, 22 June 2024 e-mail Dear Bel, I’ve been with my partner since my late 20s. It was never a great romance; we worked together and then he asked me out when we both became single. Before I knew it, I was pregnant and life just went down the road of happy families, sometimes unhappy but never horrible.
Our two grown-up children have now left home, so I have time to focus on what lies ahead for me. About six years ago, I started a passionate affair with a colleague. Despite feelings of guilt, it’s almost impossible to end it as the man gives me things that my partner doesn’t, such as affection and intimacy.
My partner hasn’t shown any sexual interest in me for many years. My lover also lacks affection from his wife, which is why we started the relationship. If I end the affair, I’m pretty sure that, unless I leave my partner, I’ll be destined for a life of no affection.
That feels almost unbearable. He’s a good man in most other ways — hard-working, caring, doesn’t drink/gamble and a good father. A lot of my female friends, also in their mid-50s, have left partners but then found it really difficult to find ‘good’ relationships.
So I’m extremely hesitant to throw away a relationship with my partner because it almost seems pointless going through a break-up just in case someone who might tick ALL th.
