DEAR READERS: The following Q&A first ran in 2020. DEAR AMY: My family and I came to America from the Soviet Union when I was a teenager. We became citizens.
I got educated here and own a successful business. I write well and speak correctly, with almost no accent. I feel like I am an American.
I love America, and try to learn new things every day, but I feel like something is missing in me. Since I spent my formative years in a communist country (truly like another planet, compared to the USA), my “autopilot” reactions are not like those of typical American-born people. For instance, my manners, topics of conversation, humor, dress, attitude toward money, and even body language can seem “foreign.
” I feel like it is hurting me to be “culturally different.” I don’t think I say or do anything straight-up offensive – it’s more like a lot of little things. How can I fix this “handicap”? I would love to know how to be more American, but I can’t find any books or courses on the subject.
– NOT Born in the USA DEAR NOT: As we approach the celebration of another Independence Day, I appreciate this unusual and provocative question, which, honestly – has no “correct” answer. First, I urge you not to see your own cultural background and habits as a “handicap,” but as an asset. Yes, America is a country.
But America is also really a series of concepts, experiments, and experiences. It is no one thing. But here is a beautiful “American” ideal (so dif.
