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NORFOLK, Va. — Memorial Day is supposed to be about mourning the nation’s fallen service members, but it’s come to anchor the unofficial start of summer and a long weekend of discounts on anything from mattresses to lawn mowers. But for people such as Manuel Castañeda Jr.

, the day is very personal. He lost his father, a U.S.



Marine who served in Vietnam, in an accident in 1966 in California while his father was training other Marines. “It isn’t just the specials. It isn’t just the barbecue,” Castañeda told The Associated Press in a discussion about Memorial Day last year.

Castañeda also served in the Marines and Army National Guard, and he knew men who died in combat. But he tries not to judge others who spend the holiday differently: “How can I expect them to understand the depth of what I feel when they haven’t experienced anything like that?” It’s a day of reflection and remembrance of those who died while serving in the U.S.

military, according to the Congressional Research Service. The holiday is observed in part by the National Moment of Remembrance, which encourages all Americans to pause at 3 p.m.

for a moment of silence. The sun shines through the flags in the Memorial Day Flag Garden on Boston Common on May 27, 2023, in Boston. The holiday stems from the American Civil War, which killed more than 600,000 service members — both Union and Confederate — between 1861 and 1865.

There’s little controversy over the first national observanc.

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